THE REPLACEMENT FUCK ITS

"You don't know what you're missing..." My secretary Alison Roth in MULHOLLAND DRIVER; on the 666 IPHONE with yours truly at some low rent downtown LA joint in funky up-town Edmonds, Washington.

Whereass, on the eve of today's fantastic OSCARS I had a srange VANILLA SKY icecream dream about me knocking up the 5' 1" Ellen Page in JUNO; and her girlfriend too, of all people.

And I didn't ever know that the sloppy seconds one I fucked was her taller blond sister wife until I googled her images.

Oh yeah, "I'd hit that shit in a heartbeat." Howard Stern

Later in the dream, we went to some little boy's upgraded gourmet [CHUCKY CHEEZE] franchise pizza birthday party scene.

Wherein Ellen's girlfriend came up to me and asked if it would be OK if we three can get together a fuck every once in awhile.

Works for me.

Obviously, the answer was yes.

Friends with benefits, and all that.

Gregory Scott Relf's TWO WITNESSES NEWSLETTER

PS AUNT JUDY: They now have a nice selection of smaller yound virgin Easter lamb rib roasts at TRADER JOES.

Ergo my favorite place to eat during the SUNDANCE FILM FESTIVAL in 1986 was ADOLFS.

Think BLOOD SIMPLE meets SILENCE OF THE LAMBS.